Bridging the divide

I'd like to write something about the problem of violence against women. I believe men have a responsibility in putting a stop to it.

This is, in part, because I am reading Gavin De Becker's "The Gift of Fear." It is also because I am a man who lives with a woman who teaches self-defense and has a black belt in karate. My perspective on these issues has changed dramatically in the past decade.

De Becker writes about how clueless men can be to the danger that women face:

"... Whether or not men can relate to it or believe it or accept it, that is the way it is. Women, particularly in big cities, live with a constant wariness. Their lives are literally on the line in ways men just don't experience. Ask some man you know, "When is the last time you were concerned or afraid that another person would harm you?" Many men cannot recall an incident within years. Ask a woman the same question and most will give you a recent example or say, "Last night," "Today," or even "Every day."

So, I'm asking you - my friends who are reading this blog - how well has De Becker hit the nail on the head?